


When Thank You Is All You Have

by hanluvr (Bria)



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Angst, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Pete's World
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2014-11-30
Packaged: 2018-02-27 11:43:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,040
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2691683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bria/pseuds/hanluvr
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After Rose falls asleep on the zeppelin ride home, the Doctor's thoughts start to haunt him before he finds comfort in a surprising source.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Thank You Is All You Have

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: Doctor Who isn't mine. If it was things would be quite different. The BBC owns all and I bow before them.
> 
> Author's Note: While I deviate from what is shown quite a bit, the image of Tentoo holding Rose in The Untempered Prism’s lovely The Zeppelin Ride Home fanart partially inspired this piece. Other inspiration was the fact I’ve wanted to do a Tentoo and Jackie piece for a while and considering the season a fic of thanks seemed in order. 
> 
> Many thanks to tenscupcake and TenRoseForever for some quick feedback on the part of this that made me the most nervous.

The Doctor looked out the zeppelin window at the stars twinkling in the distance. As they were at a lower altitude than they would’ve been in a plane, he could see them straight ahead. For the first time in what seemed forever he didn’t feel the urge at this moment to be out amongst them, exploring this new universe that was now his. 

No, he had everything he needed, everything he had wanted since the Time War, wrapped up in his arms. Rose Tyler was spread across his lap, her head nestled against his chest and sleeping soundly against his single heart. They had talked for hours, hand in hand, reminiscing and catching up, but leaving all the important stuff (the future, _them_ ) for when they were alone. Finally exhaustion had made her yawn and the Doctor had drawn his suit jacket around her shoulders and brought her to rest against his body. She had slipped off to sleep with a smile on her face. 

If only sleep would come so easily to him. He knew he needed his rest, being part-human and all, but his Time Lord mind would not let him be. Everything he had wanted for Rose, he could now have _with_ her, as long as she wanted them too. The future swam before his eyes, Rose in a white dress with a shiny ring on her finger, a new TARDIS, travelling the stars, Rose again, her belly swollen and glowing with a life they had created, laughter, Christmases, his manly ring-clad hand catching a baby as he or she took their first steps, birthdays, lazy days where they did nothing but be together as a family. He wasn’t seeing possible timelines like he had in the past, instead it was his innermost desires, domestic though they were, that he had never before dreamed possible. 

How had he come to deserve this? He knew he didn’t and that was what haunted him right now. It made him want to lash out at the injustice of it all but there was nobody and nothing to rage at, just himself. He wasn’t the cost of saving the galaxy, not at all. His former self had used that as an excuse but it didn’t hold any weight. His fate had been sealed the moment he was born, he knew that all too well. Anything would be sacrificed to give Rose Tyler the future she so deserved, even the other Doctor’s happiness. Yet that true cost of that sacrifice was Donna. And this Doctor that he was now couldn’t reconcile that he had brought it all about. 

Donna Noble, the fiery redhead that had become a surrogate sister to him, wasn’t just lost to him and his other half, but a part of her was lost to herself. That was what hurt the most. She was alive and he would be forever grateful for that, but by now she would be back home, feeling unimportant and lacking when she deserved the world. In short, the Donna he had loved and been so proud of was gone… and it was all his fault. _This_ him. _Only him_. 

“Thank you.” 

The words were softly spoken but they broke through the Doctor’s reverie like a ton of bricks. He lifted his head and looked up to see Jackie Tyler in front of him, a blanket in her hands. She walked over to him and rather than laying the blanket over her daughter like he thought she would, she draped it around his shoulders instead. 

“For what?” the Doctor asked, keeping his voice low. 

“You kept your promise. You tried to keep Rose with me at Canary Wharf and she’s here now because of you.” 

The Doctor shook his head. Thanks were the last thing he felt entitled to. “Don’t thank me. We would’ve let her stay you know, if there’d only been one of us.” 

Jackie patted his shoulder before removing her hand. “I know that, you plum. I saw the way he looked at her on the beach when he left you two. But she stayed because of you, sweetheart, because this you exists. _You_ kept my family together, Doctor. I’ll never forget that.”

The Doctor knew by the set of Jackie’s jaw (oh, how familiar that stubborn look was to him!) that she would not be persuaded otherwise and nodded his head in acknowledgement and a bit of amazement. He would’ve thought the metacrisis would take a bit more explaining to her. “You really believe I’m still the Doctor?” 

“Don’t be daft. I knew you were the second you looked at Rose. You’ve always looked at her like that, even when you wore leather.” 

“I love her, Jackie,” he confirmed with a small smile as he stroked one of Rose’s hands. 

“'Course you do. I‘ve known that have for a long time, even when you both denied it. A mum always knows when her daughter has met the one.” 

Would this woman ever cease to surprise him? He might have had his differences with her in the past but it was very clear just how much she had influenced the amazing woman Rose was today and he appreciated her words. 

“It’s not going to be easy for him and Donna as he made it seem though.” The Doctor sighed. He wasn’t willing to share Donna’s fate with anyone but Rose, but he also felt compelled to share his distress. 

“Why doesn’t that surprise me, the life you all lead?” Jackie gave him a rueful chuckle as she stepped back into the aisle to return to her seat. “Then remember them and go on. It’s what I do with my first Pete’s memories. So no more sadness, yeah?”

She was right. That was one thing, in all honesty, the _only_ thing he could do. He could honor the losses of his former self and the sacrifice of their best friend and live an amazing life with Rose. 

“Thank you,” he whispered out to the stars once Jackie was gone. It wasn’t nearly enough and never would be, but it was all he had. 

The Doctor pressed a kiss to the crown of Rose’s head, and closing his eyes, he joined her in sleep. 


End file.
